There, just for a fleeting moment, i had a flashback of what it felt like to be a kid again.
And you know what? Holy shit being a kid is fucked up! People always say, "If I knew then what i know now...." But really in actuality if you really did know the things you know now back when you were a kid, you might second guess some of things you grew up with. You would have a horrible childhood..or no childhood at all. Just think about it....
Toys would be pointless. Do you ever sit around and play toys nowadays? Are you having epic adventures with your action figures with your friends? Does Lisa come over and play Barbies with you? Nah. You're done with that shit. You're too busy trying to binge watch Dexter on Netflix. If you knew then what you know now you would never have even opened the toys out of their packages. Kept them in pristine condition so you could sell them on ebay now and make big bucks. Your excitement for xmas gifts would strictly be based on what a toy is worth in the toy collector's blue book.
All the fears you used to have would not exist. Instead of being afraid of the dark,you can be excited now cause you'll actually wanna get some sleep and you don't want any distractions. Instead of fearing the monster in your closet now you can replace that with creepy rapist. You used to tremble walking down to your basement thinking something might grab you...now the only thing keeping you out of the basement is your laziness to switch the laundry. The only real fear you would experience then would be knowing you gots to grow up..get a job and pay taxes...ugh yikes!
As much as you might want to drink..or smoke..do a little drugs..you can't do those things anymore. I'm not saying you can't..but who is going to sell to you? You're a little punk kid. You can swipe that stuff off your parents but with your current habits and consumption, they are gonna catch onto you fast. That is if we are still speaking in the knowing then what you know now concept. You would have to quit cold turkey without even starting. Better get a fake id.
All that stupid shit you used to do that you know now is completely ridiculous and caused you nothing but trouble...well.. i think we would all still do it anyways. You already know the outcome..and you are still standing here today.. so might as well do it anyways cause if you did that same stupid shit now you would pay for it one way or the other. But when you're a kid you get leniency and they don't send you to jail. Even the simple pleasures like misbehaving or smart mouthing...or as you refer to it now - "not taking shit from anyone".
You'd spend your time being grounded more constructively.
Allowance would be a joke. Wtf Ma?... How you spekt me 2 b able 2 live my lyfe on 10 dollaz?
School would be way easier. Probably all be Doogie Howsers and shit. 10 year olds as high school seniors. Laugh at ourselves knowing the only thing we have to worry about is whether or not we're gonna pass our midterm or if johnny handsome is gonna ask me to prom. We would'nt be as awkward through puberty either. No one would be using their history book to hide their mysterious boner. Guys would just flaunt that shit. Asking someone out would be less stressful. Relationships would end more amicably. I think the social groups would stay the same. They pretty much do throughout your entire life. Jocks.. Nerds.. Freaks.. etc etc.. i bet most of your friends now would probably still fall into the same group you were a part of back then. So it would be easier to make friends because you already know where you belong. punk prom dresses
You would'nt let your parents get away with the shit they got away with then...
Santa Claus my ass.
I'm precious cargo mother...learn how to drive like Not an asshole.
Dad, i know what you're doing in there...so pass the blunt nigga.
No mom..i'm sorry..you're not grounding me cause i'm a bad kid..it's because you have serious anger issues and you need professional help.
No way are you giving me a bowl haircut motherfucker!
Osh gosh ba gosh fuck all that brown corduroy shit you want to dress me in.
I'm actually not eating that squash as it turns out and i will sit here all night to prove that.
Yeah... it's probably a good thing we get to all be innocent children for awhile til it all gets funked up and we become the self loathing messes we are now.